Anxiety and Our Three Brains
I received a number of appreciative emails about my recent blog (on the ways we can calm unproductive anxiety about the future) and was inspired to share a tool that might prove useful when you find yourself in a downward spiral of unproductive worry. The tool was developed by Due Quach (pronounced Zway Kwok), social […]
Four Ways to Calm Your Worries about the Future
The future has never felt more uncertain. How much time do you waste on excessive and unproductive worrying? I define “unproductive worry” as the downward spiral in which we take stock of the unknowns and convert them into worse case scenarios. We then fixate on those worse case scenarios and let them fuel anxiety and […]
Four Ways to Relate to Past Disappointments
When I revisit the past I often feel disappointed – in myself and in others. I fixate on ways I didn’t measure up to expectations or how I felt let down by those I trusted. The past, or more precisely stated – our relationship with the past – can provide a mountain of wisdom or […]
ON MY MIND: The Cynics Among Us
I work a lot with teams that are trying to make something better – their organizations, their communities, their countries. Inevitably, early in any change process, there’s often a person at the back of the room who raises his or her hand and asks a question that’s masking a declaration of doubt. It sounds something […]
ON MY MIND: Good Design Has No Victims. Same Goes for Good Leadership.
I recently spent the afternoon at Denver’s Museum of Contemporary Art. One of the exhibitions featured a 10-foot high poster created by Rick Griffith of @MATTERdesign entitled: “An Introductory Ethic for Designers.” As I looked up at the massive manifesto and reviewed its 17 principles, it struck me that the word “leader” could easily replace […]
ON MY MIND: Healthy Teams, Building Trust One “Bid” at a Time
Think for a moment about a relationship at work that you really value. How would you describe this relationship? Now, think of a relationship where you feel less trust and connection. What makes these two relationships so different? According to relationship researcher John Gottman, we are constantly making “bids” for connection, support, and affirmation — […]
FROM MY BOOKSHELF: Think Again by Adam Grant
The old saying, “seeing is believing” doesn’t really describe how we operate as humans. If you’ve spent any time with me in a workshop, you’ve probably heard me tell a favorite story that challenges this conventional wisdom. There’s this elderly couple. The wife Ethel becomes concerned that her beloved husband Joe is losing his hearing. […]
ON MY MIND: Becoming an Adult
In a blog about “post-traumatic growth,” I explored how our most painful life events can positively shape us as people and leaders. Healing from trauma requires that we see ourselves as capable of growing – even transforming — during the course of our adult lives. Some believe that reaching adulthood is the culmination of surviving […]
ON MY MIND: The Lifeblood of your Team
Imagine your team is a living organism — one whose health relies on a network of pathways that carry all the necessary nutrients to its various parts. Now imagine that the lifeblood of your team is made up of requests and promises. Think about this for a moment: There is a constant exchange of requests […]
IN MY TOOLBAG: Stick the Landing: How to Wrap Up Your Meetings for Impact
In the world of gymnastics, the dismount is the last thing a judge sees before determining an athlete’s score. When an athlete concludes their routine with perfection commentators often say that they “stuck the landing!” Too often, leaders bring people together to have important conversations or to make critical decisions but they fail at sticking […]