ON MY MIND: The Art of Self-Repair
Recently, I discovered Kintsugi, a fifteenth century Japanese art form dedicated to repairing broken ceramics by filling in the cracks with gold. Once the repair is complete, the “brokenness” of the item — its defects — become its source of beauty and resilience. What if the trials and challenges we face in life were simply […]
ON MY MIND: Leading is Convening
“I-don’t-know.” These are three words that most leaders rarely, if ever, dare utter. Why does the admission of “not knowing” feel so uncomfortable? As a client once shared with me, “A failure to know the answer or offer the solution feels like a failure of my leadership. That’s my job!” I disagree. Always knowing the […]
FROM MY BOOKSHELF: Feedback (and Other Dirty Words): Why We Fear It, How We Fix It By M. Tamra Chandler with Laura Dowling Grealish
Everywhere we look in organizational life there is evidence that feedback is a source of fear and anxiety, both for the people on the receiving end and for those delivering it. It’s time to “fix” feedback. Too often feedback is: Non-existent: Feedback is simply avoided through an unspoken “don’t ask for it, don’t give it” […]
ON MY MIND: Demanding vs. Demeaning
Over the past month I’ve been in very similar conversations with three different clients. They’ve gone something like this: Client: I think some of my people think I’m a real a$$hole. Me: Why might they feel that way? Client: Because before I arrived nobody demanded much of them and I do. Me: What do you […]
IN MY TOOL BAG: Meet IRMA — The Impact x Resources Matrix
Have you ever been part of a meeting that produced a terrifyingly long list of new projects and initiatives? As a client of mine recently described such a meeting, “It was an energizing and inspiring conversation right up until the point we realized we were going to have to implement all of these ideas!” Without […]
ON MY MIND: Saying a Skillful “No”
What makes saying “no” so difficult? First, we all have these archetypal saboteurs that run like tape recordings in our heads. Some of the saboteurs that make saying “no” most difficult include: The pleaser who believes “people won’t like or value me if I don’t meet their needs by saying ‘yes.’” The hyper-achiever who believes […]
ON MY MIND: Retreats that Make a Difference (Part 3)
re*treat. (verb) withdraw to a quiet or secluded place. (noun) a designated time of seclusion from routine activities to gain clarity and/or renewal. When planning a retreat, when does it make sense to bring in an experienced facilitator? Groups can often self-facilitate. However, engaging an outside facilitator is particularly beneficial in situations where the retreat […]
ON MY MIND: Retreats that Make a Difference (Part 2)
re*treat. (verb) withdraw to a quiet or secluded place. (noun) a designated time of seclusion from routine activities to gain clarity and/or renewal. Just as building designers follow universal principles and work with dimensions like angles, color, and shape, so must meeting architects consider a unique set of design dimensions. Once the foundation of the […]
ON MY MIND: Retreats that Make a Difference (Part 1)
re*treat. (verb) withdraw to a quiet or secluded place. (noun) a designated time of seclusion from routine activities to gain clarity and/or renewal. Retreats do two important things. First, they take us “away”—far from the demands of the office and shielded from everyday interruptions. Second, they bring us “together”— into a common, in-person, relaxed space. […]
ON MY MIND: What Do You Stand For?
“Core values are the timeless ideals that require no external justification.” -Jim Collins For leaders and organizations, core values define what it means to operate with integrity. In my book, Standing in the Fire, I define “knowing what you stand for” as having clarity about and commitment to one’s core values. Core values are distinct […]