Do You REALLY “Get” Them?

Do You REALLY “Get” Them?

If you are going to lead – truly lead a team – there is one thing your people must believe and say about you; “my leader gets me”. This phrase is shorthand for: You know what motivates them to show up each day. You seek to understand and affirm their feelings and...
Recognizing and Dealing with Defensiveness

Recognizing and Dealing with Defensiveness

It’s not easy to give critical feedback. Especially when the person on the receiving end gets defensive. Here are five common types of defensive responses. How many have you encountered (or perhaps even caught yourself engaging in)? Deny or Argue Intent: Cause...
Resources for Building Bridges Across Divides

Resources for Building Bridges Across Divides

Lately I’ve been yearning for reasons to feel hopeful. Our country feels more polarized than ever and, regardless of political affiliation, people seem less interested in listening, more self-righteous, and quicker to dismiss and label the “other” as the “enemy” or...
Discover Your Inner Saboteurs

Discover Your Inner Saboteurs

For many years I’ve been asking my coaching clients to complete a free online self-assessment instrument developed by Shirzad Chamine, Stanford University lecturer and author of the New York Times bestselling book Positive Intelligence. His assessment helps identify...
Ugly Fruit and the Art of Holding Judgment

Ugly Fruit and the Art of Holding Judgment

The mind is amazing in its ability to process information and also the speed at which it reaches conclusions. The problem is: such conclusions are often based on judgments or attributions that are inaccurate. We see things only from where we sit, filtered – often...
Six Countercultural Declarations

Six Countercultural Declarations

An excerpt from Parker Palmer’s book, Hidden Wholeness, chronicles the ways in which blizzards – like life – can be overwhelming and disorienting. It’s a reflective piece about how swirling events and social forces can pull us farther and farther away from...
Is Your Ego Getting the Best of You?

Is Your Ego Getting the Best of You?

I think about ego as the idealized or overinflated story each of us tells about who we are – a story that is like a shield. It provides protection, but also blocks our view and it is very difficult to put down. Do you have an ego story? It might be the story about how...